Well, the tragicosity continues. It appears that every time I have the mood to write funny, like Geenicks, I come here. Well good then, if I want to pulish something it will be this one I publish.
I still like you, the you in the previous entry. But now I want to duff my ex up. For saying he wants to patch up. Seriously I wanted to tell him to go to ... well, maybe not, but firstly, SOME GUTS. Secondly, PLEASE, leave me alone, it would have been much kinder to. You see, well, I did sort of say no. But him asking me in the first place has made me all of a dither. Not really a dither, because I made a sort-of decision and I think you got the idea, but still, I felt really, really bad when you told me that you couldn't get over it. WHY NOT???? If you had been in front of me I would have taken you by the shoulders and shook you violently....if I could, anyway. I was really, really flabbergasted that you would say that. Frankly, I AM over you. It shocks me in a way to say it, but yes, I am. I don't want to be with you, and neither do I want to give it a go, but I felt so bad that I couldn't say it out right, but I told you why, at least - that I don't think we were good together. I think you got it because you left me alone ever since, but I feel really really bad thinking that you haven't gotten over me and that I may have made you sad by saying I didn't think we were good together. Oh is THAT why I feel guilty. I get it now. I've been wondering why I feel so awful.
Plus I suppose it is le fact that ....I can't settle for you anymore. You may be nice and all, but the truth of the fact is I have raised my standards a bit. I am not that bad looking. I am average looking and I think I could go for someone a bit better looking and better sounding. I am vairy superficial, but such are the realizations when you are not really desperate to be attached or married. When I thought, between being single and being with you, I'd rather be single, I had to admit to myself that it really is over, and I couldn't keep that from you. I am vairy sorry - not only to you but to all my friends and mates who wished that we both still had a chance. I'm sorry that I don't want you back anymore. I just feel like I would be throwing my life away if I took you back. I know it's very mean to say it but that is the truth.
I hope I don't accidentally blub this out to Dr. H. tomorrow, that would be tres pathetico.
ooomygod. I just realised how very Geenicks my life is turning. Where I am in love sort of ish with a matey mate but it is one-sided (only the wrong side) and it is more like I am Dave, rather than Gee. I have an ex who wants to patch but I have turned him away (unfortunately he is not SG. If he was, I would have said yes in a jiffy tho'. Toldja I was superficial.) And I may be going on a trip with my pally wally ...with my parents.
I'd actually really have Gee's life, at least she has Dave. I have no one worth having, if you get what I mean.
Eating Balloons [: @ 9:58 AM : D